Perhaps your neighbour has a cat. Her cat sleeps with her, grooms her, and greets her at the door when she comes home after a long day at work.
Your cat, on the other hand, may be a little, well, aloof. He’s quiet and keeps to himself. He doesn’t seem especially pleased or annoyed when you pet him or attempt to engage him in play. He just appears disinterested.
Just like people, cats have different personalities, which begin to develop early in kittenhood. How much your kitten was socialized will impact his personality today. That doesn’t mean you can’t develop the same kind of bond your neighbour has with her cat. You can.
Give your cat what he needs.
It seems simple but a happy cat is more likely to bond with you. Make sure your cat always has fresh water, a clean litter box, play time, and sufficient food each day.
Give your cat plenty of attention.
Allow your cat to come to you. If he’s hiding under a chair, don’t pull him out and start trying to pet and to hug him. You’ll only annoy him. When your cat comes to you, sit down and gently pet and softly talk to him. The more you do this the more comfortable he will become and the more likely he will seek you out for affection.
Offer your cat a comfy cat bed.
Cats usually find a special spot – a favorite chair or the corner of your bed, for example – they like to curl up on and go to sleep. Even if that’s the case with your cat, give your cat a comfortable pet bed in which he can curl up if he feels like it. But, before you put it down, rub the bed on your clothes so he will smell your scent and become familiar with you when he lies down.
Sit with your cat during meals.
One of the best ways to shower affection on your cat is to sit next to him while he’s busy eating. Softly talk to him and pet his back at each meal so he can become familiar with and learn to trust you.
Use positive reinforcement.
Animals – just like people – typically respond much better with positive reinforcement. When your cat comes to you when you call him, reward him with a favorite treat. He will learn that coming to you is a positive, happy experience.
Bonding with a cat doesn’t always happen overnight. However, if you are consistent and determined, you can bond with your cat – no matter how aloof he may be.